You’re Not a Loser, You’re Just Low on Cash
Monday Money Missive
My dear Kindred Spirit,
As we move through our days, we make assumptions about how others are doing based on what we see. Often, it seems like they have it all together.
When you’re struggling, that can feel awful.
One of the privileges of my work is that I get to hear about what’s truly going on in my clients’ lives. I have a window into their inner worlds: their challenges, their doubts, their misgivings, their self-consciousness, their fears and, sometimes, their failures.
I don’t know if you need to hear this or not, but we ALL feel like failures sometimes, no matter how successful our lives look on the outside.
But that’s all it is—a feeling.
A client checked her bank account a few days ago and voxed me to say that there was far less money there than she thought there would be, and she had an overwhelming feeling of defeat.
Again—a feeling.
We can make up a story about that feeling, one that will ratchet up the “I’m a loser” sense we have of ourselves in that moment. Or we can tap into our agency.
That might mean giving yourself a pep talk.
It might mean getting curious about the situation, and asking yourself some questions.
It might mean getting serious about taking responsibility.
It might mean making a decision to never, ever land here again.
It might mean reaching out to your coach (I happen to know a good one) or a friend and asking for support.
However you choose to respond, the most important thing to know is that money will bring up all kinds of feelings. We pretend money is about numbers, but the truth is that money is highly emotional. We ascribe all kinds of meanings to it, and to ourselves, based on how much of it happens to be flowing through our lives at any given moment.
Recognize when a feeling triggers you to tell yourself a story about the situation that reinforces the feeling. Do you want to keep telling yourself that story? Or do you want to do something about it? There is no right or wrong answer here. But there is a choice.
The only true failure is to bow down to defeat and stay there. In my experience that takes a lot of energy, and isn’t at all satisfying.
What are your thoughts about this? Please hit the heart and add a comment. I’d love to hear.
with love,
Laura
When you’re ready, here are some ways you can connect with me:
Sign up for my Content Writers’ Creation Circle. We have a lovely group of women who gather weekly on Thursday mornings to support one another as we each create content for our businesses. I typically use that time to write to you. Another member is working on a book proposal, one often works on her podcast, another works on her online classes or on her book manuscripts, while another member works on content for her YouTube channel. All genders welcome! Find out more here, and reach out to me for a prorated rate. We have 11 circles remaining in this session.
Join my free, HSP-friendly networking event, which I co-host with Suzanne Culberg. We always have a lovely group of humans. Our next event is on April 23rd at 4pm Eastern. You can sign up to get the Zoom link and reminders for this, and future events, here.
Listen to the Woman Uncaged podcast, which I co-host with Linda Katz. We have a lot of fun talking about women’s liberation, and this week we will record our 50th episode! You can find our most popular episode, The Uncaged Woman and Romantic Relationships with Men, here.
My business is barely a year old and although I've earned some revenue it by no means is covering my expenses. I understand that building a business is a marathon AND it's hard at times to remember by baby biz is going need time to produce predictable revenue. Not a lot of good resources to my knowledge that offer wise counsel in this area. It just takes time.